sex education

Shared living is one of the residential service models available to individuals with intellectual/developmental disabilities (I/DD) who receive services from the Department of Developmental Services. Shared living services provide support to the individual in a natural, family environment.

An important focus of shared living is to foster relationships and promote community inclusion. Sexual expression can be a part of some relationships.

A provider’s role

Shared Living Providers (SLP) can support the person living in their home to develop a positive sexual identity. By providing a supportive, non-judgmental environment, the
SLP has the opportunity to assist the individual with building a healthy self concept, positive self esteem and confidence to discover who they are as an individual.
Another area that a
SLP can influence is the person’s experience of intimacy and building healthy relationships. It is very important for a
SLP to work with the individual to build a home environment that is safe and comfortable. It takes time and acceptance of the individual for who they are to build a trusting relationship and create an intimate environment where the person feels at home.

Some things to remember

• A person with I/DD is a sexual being and has the same need for relationships as everyone else.

• It takes time for a person to adjust to a new living situation and being around new people. Trust has to be built between everyone. Making consistent time for 1:1 attention is a great way to make a person feel accepted.

•
SLPs have to know their own limits; sexuality is complicated. The topics being raised may challenge your comfort level or may be topics you don’t know well enough to confidently discuss. As a
SLP, if you need help, ask your case manager at the agency.
• Take the person’s questions seriously. They are struggling to understand their feelings and learning how to express them.

Together we can make a difference in how a person with I/DD understands their sexuality. In turn, they can learn how to enjoy their relationships in safe, healthy and fun ways.

As a sexuality educator, I have been honored to meet individuals with developmental disabilities, their families and paid caregivers in a variety of circumstances. Many understand and embrace the idea of people with disabilities as sexual beings. Some struggle with the topic, and are not quite sure if they are ready to pursue additional information.

Regardless of their comfort level, the people I meet are seeking assistance to help their client, loved one or themselves understand and express their sexuality in safe, healthy and fun ways.

Defining Sexuality

In my experience, I have learned that having a broader understanding of what sexuality is provides everyone involved with information and tools to overcome hesitation and begin to proactively build supports for the person. This is the definition I use:

Sexuality is the integration of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual aspects of an individual’s personality that express maleness and femaleness. It begins at birth and affects all the senses; it is not limited to genitals. Sexuality involves identity, reproduction, sensuality and intimacy.

From: Who Cares? A Handbook on Sex Education and Counseling Services for Disabled People. (Cornelius, D., Chipouras, S., Makas, E., Daniels, S. 1979. University Park Press, Baltimore.)

A definition that make sense

I like this definition for several reasons.

First, by saying that sexuality is both part of our personality and a lifelong part of who we are as human beings, it emphasizes the inherent nature of sexuality for all people.

Second, it lists four aspects of our personality that are integral to our sexuality: physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual – clarifying that the physical aspect is only one area of sexuality, not the entire deal.

Finally, it identifies four avenues through which we both develop and express sexuality: identity, reproduction, sensuality and intimacy.

Sexuality is a part of us all

It is important to have a good idea of what sexuality entails so that the thought of it doesn’t scare us away from providing education, support and opportunities for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities (I/DD) to fully develop this important aspect of their personality.

Sexuality is always a part of who we are and we, as family members and paid caregivers, must create healthy and safe ways for children and adults with I/DD to build their own ways of understanding and expressing sexuality.

Tag: sex education

The Role of Shared Living Providers in Supporting Healthy Sexuality of the People they Serve

A provider’s role

Some things to remember

Sexuality and People with Developmental and Intellectual Disabilities

Defining Sexuality

A definition that make sense

Sexuality is a part of us all